The English Language, an anomoly.

I was born to an American mother and a Japanese father in Japan. Since we were not military, I went to the Japanese schools, and was fluent in both languages, at least in the spoken realm. You see, my mother did not know any Japanese, and spoke to me in English. I actually had to go out to play with the other kids to learn that language. I even went to school there until I started 3rd grade, and was proficient in reading and language skills.

Anyway, upon coming to Wisconsin, and going to American schools, while I could read well enough, even at grade level, yet I couldn't spell, because there was no need to learn to spell English in Japan.
So, here I am, learning the rules... When you get two vowels together, and the e follows the first, it's a long first vowel. Example, aerial. The e is silent, the first a is long. A vowel is followed by a single consonant, and then an e, the first vowel is long. Example. Evening. You don't pronounce it ev-en-ing, it's pronounced ee-v-ning. Another example, rule. The u is long. Okay, so what about the word elephant? Why is it el-eh-fant, rather than ee-l-fant?

So you have read and read. Why is it red for past tense, when the rule says, when two vowels are together, the first is long and the second is silent? But the e is short? What's up with that? I have no idea. Then how about the word example? Why is the final e silent? What purpose is it serving? No one had an answer... I must have frustrated my 3rd grade teachers here in Wisconsin, because I was full of questions that there's no explanation except that it's an exception, while some rules have more of those, so why have a rule if there are more exceptions?

The rest of the Western speaking languages based on Latin follow this basic principal. And funny how the Japanese vowels just happen to follow this pattern too... In any other language, except English, here are the vowels:
A = aa as in father.
E= e.h as in the first e in elephant.
I = i-h as in the name Lisa.
O = o as in okay.
U = oo. as in duped.

No exceptions. It doesn't matter if you have 3 or more of the vowels in front of you. Pronounce each one as you see them as according to the above phonic pronunciation. If you see a dash, it's just drawn out longer, not change the sound. So, of you see u- as in oooops!

Then I want to know, how is it that though, enough and through, the "ough" is pronounced "owe", "of" and "ooh", when they're spelled exactly the same?

Yet we expect those who don't understand or speak English to learn with ease... But when Americans go abroad, we want an interpreter. Go figure.

Do you have an experience with a weird English language incident?

Have you communicated through a language barrier, and because of the cultural differences, understand something different, and acted accordingly, and still laugh about it?

Any experience would be welcome.